Top Ten Reasons Trick-Or-Treat Is Better Than Sex

  1. Guaranteed to get a little something in the sack
  2. If you get tired, wait ten minutes and go at it again
  3. The uglier you look, the easier it is to get some
  4. You don’t have to compliment the person who gives you candy
  5. The person you are with doesn’t fantasize you are someone else
  6. Forty years from now you will still enjoy candy
  7. If you wear a Bill Clinton mask, no one thinks you are kinky
  8. Doesn’t matter if the kids hear you moan and groan
  9. Less guilt the next morning
  10. If you don’t get what you want, you can always go next door.
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