- Indecision is the key to flexibility.
- You can’t tell which way the train went by looking at the track.
- There is no substitute for a genuine lack of preparation.
- Happiness is merely the remission of pain.
- Nostalgia isn’t what it used to be.
- Sometimes too much drink is not enough.
- The facts, although interesting, are irrelevant.
- The careful application of terror IS a form of communication.
- Someone who thinks logically is a nice contrast to the real world.
- Things are more like today than they ever were before.
- Anything worth fighting for is worth fighting dirty for.
- Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler.
- Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
- I have seen the truth and it makes no sense.
- Suicide is the most sincere form of self criticism.
- All things being equal, fat people use more soap.
- If you can smile when things go wrong, you must have someone to blame.
- One seventh of your life is spent on Mondays.
- By the time you can make ends meet they’ve moved.
- There is no evidence to support the notion that life is serious.
- The more you run over a cat the flatter it gets.
- There is always one more idiot than you counted on.
- When someone says this is as bad as it can get, don’t bet on it.
- Never wrestle a pig, you both get dirty, and he likes it.
- The trouble with life, It’s a do-it yourself thing without instructions.
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