The Top 10 Things I Added To “Beast” (my computer)

Beast is my i386DX-25. It will soon be FreeBSD. Vanity mirror 32 GB Ultra-wide SCSI hard drive (yeah, right) 51″ monitor Cup holder that says “8X” Commodore 64 emulator A REAL mouse (It wiggles all over the place when I plug its tail in) Class A IP subnet An IPng … Continue reading

Smurf; Biological Reproduction and Cultural Development

One of the great mysteries that has puzzled men and women of the current 15-25 year-old generation is the riddle of the smurfs. Where exactly did they come from? How on earth do they reproduce? Where did Papa Smurf come from? Is smucking a real smurf cultural event? Here, after … Continue reading

Humorously Translated Signs From Around The World

In a Czechoslovakian tourist agency: Take one of our horse-driven city tours – we guarantee no miscarriages. Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand: Would you like to ride on your own ass? In a Swiss mountain inn: Special today — no ice cream. In a Bangkok temple: It is forbidden … Continue reading

Computer proficient canines

Reasons Dogs Don’t Use Computers 20 Can’t stick their heads out of Windows ’95. 19 Fetch command not available on all platforms. 18 Hard to read the monitor with your head cocked to one side. 17 Too difficult to “mark” every website they visit. 16 Can’t help attacking the screen … Continue reading