600 Pick Lines; Guaranteed to Work (page 3 of 6)

Were you in Boy Scouts? Because you sure have tied my heart in a knot. Have you seen (any movie)? Would you like to? If I gave you a sexy negligee, would there be anything in it for me? If you and I were squirrels, could I bust a nut … Continue reading

Top 10 Things I did on my 20th Birthday, April 27, 1998

Finished a bunch of Linear Algebra labs that Dr. Hall lovingly gave me as gifts Realized my dream of fighting in an ECW match Parachuted off the top of Hoyt Helped myself to the old VAX 11-785 Helped myself to some unused IP addresses Began my doctoral dissertation 😛 Tossed … Continue reading

Top 10 Excuses for Not Doing Math Homework

I accidentally divided by zero and my paper burst into flames Gottfried Leibniz’s birthday I couldn’t actually reach my notebook…I could only get arbitrarily close to it I had a proof, but there wasn’t enough room to write it in this margin I got tied up watching the World Series … Continue reading

100 Ways to Confuse Your Roommate

Insist that you are a vegetarian and protest anytime your roommate eats meat. Then leave “Slim Jim” wrappers on the floor and lie on the bed holding your stomach everytime your roommate walks in. If he/she asks about the wrappers, say you know nothing about them. Get some hair. Disperse … Continue reading