Internet Geek — Top 10

TOP 10 SIGNS YOU ARE AN INTERNET GEEK (10) When filling out your driver’s license application you give your IP address. (9) You no longer ask prospective dates what their sign is, instead your line is “Hi, what’s your URL?” (8) Instead of calling you to dinner, your spouse sends … Continue reading

Entrance Exam – Football Player Version

Entrance Exam – Football Player Version Time Limit: 3 WKS What language is spoken in France? Give a dissertation on the ancient Babylonian Empire with particular reference to architecture, literature, law and social conditions -OR- give the first name of Pierre Trudeau. Would you ask William Shakespeare to build a … Continue reading

dating rules for college (contains offensive language)

Dating Rules For College 1. In an imaginary world a kiss would signify the end of sexual tension and the beginning of a relationship. In college, it means somebody’s horny. 2. In an imaginary world, “I really like spending time with you” and “you’re cool” mean I REALLY like spending … Continue reading

Real Programmers

Don’t eat quiche. Real programmers don’t even know how to spell Quiche. They like Twinkies, Coke, and palate-scorching Szechwan food. Don’t write application programs. They program right down to the bare metal. Application programs are for dullards who can’t do system programming. Don’t write specs. Users should be grateful for … Continue reading

You Know It Is Time To Get Out Of Consulting When

You know it is time to get out of consulting when… 1. You ask the waiter what the restaurant’s core competencies are. 2. You decide to re-org your family into a “team-based organization.” 3. You refer to dating as test marketing. 4. You can spell “paradigm.” 5. You actually know … Continue reading

50 Fun Things Todo in a Final That Doesn’t Matter

You are going to fail the class completely no matter what you get on the final exam, so: Bring a pillow. Fall asleep (or pretend to) until the last 15 minutes. Wake up, say “oh geez, better get cracking” and do some gibberish work. Turn it in a few minutes … Continue reading