Acronyms

ISDN It Still Does Nothing APPLE Arrogance Produces Profit-Losing Entity SCSI System Can’t See It DOS Defective Operating System BASIC Bill’s Attempt to Seize Industry Control IBM I Blame Microsoft DEC Do Expect Cuts CD-ROM Consumer Device, Rendered Obsolete Monthly OS/2 Obsolete Soon, Too. WWW World Wide Wait MACINTOSH Most … Continue reading

Real Programmers Don’t Eat Quiche

Don’t eat quiche. Real programmers don’t even know how to spell Quiche. They like Twinkies, Coke, and palate-scorching Szechwan food. Don’t write application programs. They program right down to the bare metal. Application programs are for dullards who can’t do system programming. Don’t write specs. Users should be grateful for … Continue reading

The Buzzphrase Generator

THE BUZZPHRASE GENERATOR A kindly gentleman, after a seminar in Canada, gave me this gem. We can all use it to write impressive reports to the systems analysts and “E-Ring” experts in the Pentagon. It all started as a TIC (Tongue In Cheek) aid for preparing speeches and briefings. The … Continue reading

Warning Signs of Insanity for Programmers.

Warning Signs of Insanity for Programmers. 1. You stay up all night coding only to realize that you haven’t had any caffine in about 6 hours. 2. You start listening to music and see it properly indented in your head. 3. You think the cleaning lady is sining in tune. … Continue reading

Real Programmers

Don’t eat quiche. Real programmers don’t even know how to spell Quiche. They like Twinkies, Coke, and palate-scorching Szechwan food. Don’t write application programs. They program right down to the bare metal. Application programs are for dullards who can’t do system programming. Don’t write specs. Users should be grateful for … Continue reading

Microsoft Windows for Macintosh Advertising Campaign

I heard that Microsoft is going to come out with a version of Windows for the MacIntosh. I can imagine what the advertisements will be: Are you tired of the user-friendliness of your MacIntosh? Then get Microsoft Windows for MacIntosh, featuring limited on-line help and poor documentation! Why settle for … Continue reading