Has Someone Said “You Don’t Know Jack Schitt….”?

Jack Schitt is the only son of O. Schitt and Awe Schitt. O.Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married Awe Schitt, who later ran the Kneedeep Inn-Schitt. Jack Schitt eventually married Noe Schitt, and together they produced six children. Holy Schitt, their first child, passed on shortly after birth. Next came twin … Continue reading

story

You see there was this guy once named Luigi, but he didn’t like the name so he changed it to Larry. He didn’t really know why he changed it to Larry, he just did. The good thing was people didn’t pick on him for his name anymore. The bad thing … Continue reading

More Stupid American Laws

These are real standing laws from around the United States of America. Hope you enjoy them and remember, Law Enforcement is no joke! Alabama It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle. California Community leaders passed an ordinance that makes it illegal for anyone to … Continue reading

Politically Correct?

Have you ever wanted to talk about a girl but was afraid that you would offend the person standing near you?…NOT. Well, if you are, then here are some alternatives to some popular phrases. She is not: An airhead She is: Reality Impaired She is not: A Bleached Blond She … Continue reading

Quotes By Women

I feel convinced that a girl would never let herself be brought to the altar, no, she would probably refuse completely, if she knew *everything*… — Queen Victoria I married below my standards – all women do. — Nancy Astor You meet a lot of smart guys with stupid wives, … Continue reading

Top 25 Reasons that Hockey is Better than Sex

It’s ok to bleed during play. If it’s a bad game, you can call a time out. Every player usually has two or three sticks to choose from. There is a limit to the sizes of all equipment. You can still play when you get married. You can change on … Continue reading

Jobs and lovemaking

Three married women were sitting around talking, and the subject of making love came up. The first woman said, “Well, I’m married to a psychologist, so whenever we make love, he always brings me home flowers and chocolates first, and it just puts me right in the mood, and we … Continue reading

What Not to Name Your Dog

Everyone who has a dog names him “Rover” or “Spot“. I call mine Sex. Now, Sex has been embarrassing to me. When I went to the City Hall to renew his license, I told the clerk I would like to have a license for Sex. He said, “Me too.” Then … Continue reading

Reply to: Notice of Increased Tax Payments

I need to Reply to : NOTICE OF INCREASED TAX PAYMENT Effective January 1, 1997 Dear President Clinton, I have a few questions on your new “peter tax” that I need to ask to accertain that I fill out the Tax Form properly. 1. You mentioned a tax amount that … Continue reading

what is marriage?

SUBJECT…… THE “LIGHTER” SIDE OF MARRIAGE 1. Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence (a life sentence!). 2. Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music is over, the strings are attached. 3. Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore marriage is an institution for … Continue reading