600 Pick Lines; Guaranteed to Work (page 1 of 6)

That outfit would look great in a crumpled heap next to my bed. Nice shoes, wanna fuck? You have some nice jewelry. It would look great on my nightstand. Do you know what’d look good on you? Me. [Look at her shirt label. When they say, “What are you doing?”:] … Continue reading

bad Irish joke

Q. How do you get a one armed Irish man out of a tree. A. Wave to him.

Dear IRS; Take my Children, PLEASE!

This is a real letter by someone at Intel. The IRS sent me a letter last Friday. They audited my return and denied two of my dependent deductions! I thought you might like to read my response which, while more devastating than any militia plot, is a kinder and gentler … Continue reading

Irish Definitions

HAPPILY MARRIED IRISH COUPLE: A husband with another man’s wife. IRISH ALCOHOLIC: Anybody who will drink with anybody to anybody. IRISH ATHEIST: A man who goes about wishing to God he could believe in God. IRISH BANQUET: A potato and a six pack. IRISH BEAUTY: A colleen with two black … Continue reading