Hazardous Materials Safety Data Sheet; Women – A Chemical Analysis

ELEMENT Women SYMBOL Wo DISCOVERER Adam ATOMIC MASS Accepted at 53.6kg, but known to vary from 40-200kg OCCURRENCES Copious quantities in all urban areas PHYSICAL PROPERTIES Surface usually covered in painted film. Boils at nothing; freezes without known reason. Melts if given special treatment. Bitter if incorrectly used. Found in … Continue reading

Dictonary of Gardening

Or the real truth about that funny place round the back. Aaaa Sound produced by dozing gardener when stung by bee trapped in said gardener’s trouser leg. Annual Any plant that dies before blooming. Aphid Insect pest that inphests gardens and makes gardeners phoam at the mouth, stamp their pheet … Continue reading

woman, a chemical analysis

HAZARDOUS MATERIALS INFORMATION SHEET ======================================= MATERIALS SAFETY DATA SHEET WOMEN – A CHEMICAL ANALYSIS ELEMENT: Women SYMBOL: Wo DISCOVERER: Adam ATOMIC MASS: Accepted at 53.6kg, but known to vary from 40-200kg OCCURRENCES: Copious quantities in all urban areas PHYSICAL PROPERTIES: 1. Surface usually covered in painted film. 2. Boils at … Continue reading

A conversation between an Rabbi and a Priest….

A rabbi and a priest were talking shop. The priest began, “If I am successful, preach excellent sermons, and please my superiors, eventually I may become a Bishop.” “That’s very nice,” said the rabbi. “And then,” the priest continued, “if all goes well, within a few more years, I can … Continue reading

Smurf; Biological Reproduction and Cultural Development

One of the great mysteries that has puzzled men and women of the current 15-25 year-old generation is the riddle of the smurfs. Where exactly did they come from? How on earth do they reproduce? Where did Papa Smurf come from? Is smucking a real smurf cultural event? Here, after … Continue reading

Real Programmers

Don’t eat quiche. Real programmers don’t even know how to spell Quiche. They like Twinkies, Coke, and palate-scorching Szechwan food. Don’t write application programs. They program right down to the bare metal. Application programs are for dullards who can’t do system programming. Don’t write specs. Users should be grateful for … Continue reading