The World’s Best Worst Pickup Lines

I want to melt in your mouth, not in your hand. Can I borrow a quarter? [“What for?”] I want to call my mom and tell I just met the girl of my dreams. OR I want to call your mother and thank her. Is your daddy a thief? [“No.”] … Continue reading

29 BEST PICKUP LINES

THE WORLD’S BEST PICKUP LINES 1. I want to melt in your mouth, not in your hand. 2. Can I borrow a quarter? [“What for?”] I want to call my mom and tell I just met the girl of my dreams. OR: I want to call your mother and thank … Continue reading

Beavis and Butthead Pickup Lines

Uh, hey baby. Uh, do you like come here often, huh huh. I said “come.” You need a man in your life, baby. And like, I need a woman. Let’s like get into each other’s life or whatever. Uh, like let’s drop all the uh B.S. and like, you know, … Continue reading

Smurf Sex

A Joke not suitable for readers under the age of 18.

It’s time to tell the truth about Smurfs. You see, Smurfs are a lot like other folks; they have dreams and ambitions, deep, thoughtful conversations with each other, and good and bad times. “But,” people ask, “do Smurfs have….. you know,…… sex?” The answer is an emphatic and resounding YES! And … Continue reading

Best Man stuff

_____________ The Best Man’s toast to the bride & groom at my wedding was: “… and, remembering Socrates, who said: ‘By all means, a man should marry. If it succeeds, he will be happy beyond his dreams. If it does not, he will become a Philosopher.’ Here’s hoping we never … Continue reading

People who go to college are incredible.

We go to classes. We read and absorb and are comprehensively tested on heavy amounts of various materials. We sleep very little. We drink ourselves into oblivion. We kill ourselves with various types of smoke. We cough and keep smoking. Someone is always sick. Someone it always complaining. We become … Continue reading