Wahed My Dog

“I washed my dog last night and he died.” “Died? But why? Washing a dog can’t kill it.” “Well, it was either washing it or the spin dryer that did it.”

You Know You’re a Grad Student When…

You just might be a grad student if: you can identify universities by their internet domains. you are constantly looking for a thesis in novels. you have difficulty reading anything that doesn’t have footnotes. you understand jokes about Foucoult. the concept of free time scares you. you consider caffeine to … Continue reading

Died in Service

A young boy and his father were standing in church foyer, looking at a memorial dedicated to all the men and women who had died in war. “What’s that Daddy?”, the little boy asked. “It’s a memorial to all the people who have died in service, son”, the father replied. … Continue reading

Best Man stuff

_____________ The Best Man’s toast to the bride & groom at my wedding was: “… and, remembering Socrates, who said: ‘By all means, a man should marry. If it succeeds, he will be happy beyond his dreams. If it does not, he will become a Philosopher.’ Here’s hoping we never … Continue reading

a brief survey of history (well, parts of this are funny)

WHAT HAPPENED TODAY IN HISTORY? (Inaccurately compiled by:) The JOKEMASTER (Solely irresponsible for inaccuracies) Events —— 732 – The invention of water. 733 – The discovery of water pollution. 1263 – A Hawaiian man, Paiilowmonoii, was the first to discover that man does not survive a leap into an active … Continue reading

Students’ History of the World

A STUDENTS’ HISTORY OF THE WORLD as collected by Richard Lederer (One of the fringe benefits of being an English or history professor is receiving the occasional jewel of a student blooper in an essay or report. Here is the history of the world, pasted together from genuine student bloopers, … Continue reading