Guide to College

Many of you young persons out there are seriously thinking about going to college. (That is, of course, a lie. The only things you young persons think seriously about are loud music and sex. Trust me: these are closely related to college.) College is basically a bunch of rooms where … Continue reading

Off to the Races (a bit risque)

Off to the Races ALFRED RACEWAY Time: Midnight Distance: All the way Purse: $200.00 Weather: Very Drunk Track: Drippy Name Odds Name Odds —- —- —- —- Bare Belly 2-1 Silk Panties 2-1 Passionate Lady 5-1 Clean Sheets 100-1 Conscience 100-1 Big Dick 3-1 Heavy Bosom 6-1 Thighs 5-1 Cherry … Continue reading

Kid’s Answers to Questions on Love

WHAT EXACTLY IS MARRIAGE?? “Marriage is when you get to keep your girl and don’t have to give her back to her parents!” -Eric, 6 “When somebody’s been dating for a while, the boy might propose to the girl. He says to her, ‘I’ll take you for a whole life, … Continue reading