Shit Happens In Various Professions

Profession Shit Happens Mathematician Shit happening is just a special case… Statistician There is an 83.7% chance that shit will happen. Maybe. Physicist (Theoretical) Shit SHOULD happen. Physicist (Experimental) To within experimental error, shit DID happen. Engineer I hope this shit holds together. Chemist I hope this shit doesn’t blow … Continue reading

The Glass Is Half Full

Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass is half empty. Realist: The glass is. Idealist: The glass should be full. Feminist: My glass seems LESS full than HIS glass. Environmentalist: Save the water. Anarchist: Break the glass! Capitalist: Let’s sell the glass. Chemist: It’s 50% H2O, 40% N2 … Continue reading

Prime Numbers

Premises of the joke: 1) Mathematicians are prone to use faulty induction. 2) Physicists dismiss contradictory evidence as experimental error 3) Chemists make faulty observations So, let’s get a thread going. Can you think of any other people to make fun of? Here’s what comes to mind: Lawyers: one is … Continue reading

How do they do it ?

Anthropologists do it with culture. Archeologists do it with mummies. Architects do it late. Bankers do it with interest, but pay for early withdrawl. Bayseians probably do it. Boy Scouts do it in the woods. C++ programmers do it with class. C++ programmers do it with private members and public … Continue reading