The Top 25 Rejected Children’s Books

The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables The Care Bears Maul Some Campers and Are Shot Dead Nancy Drew, The Hardy Boys, and The Vice Squad Daddy Loses His Job and Finds the Bottle Clifford the Big Red Dog Is Put To Sleep Where in the New York … Continue reading

100 Ways to Confuse Your Roommate

Insist that you are a vegetarian and protest anytime your roommate eats meat. Then leave “Slim Jim” wrappers on the floor and lie on the bed holding your stomach everytime your roommate walks in. If he/she asks about the wrappers, say you know nothing about them. Get some hair. Disperse … Continue reading

May be offensive to Clinton supporters

BILL CLINTON STATUE COMMITTEE LITTLE ROCK, ARKANSAS Dear Friend and Fellow Voter: We have the distinguished honor of being on the committee for raising five million dollars for the purpose of placing a statue of Bill Clinton in the Hall of Fame in Washington, D.C. This committee was in a … Continue reading

The Promise

Five thousand years ago Moses said: “Pack up your camel, pick up your shovel, move your ass, and I will lead you to the promised land.” Five thousand years later Franklin D. Roosevelt said, “Lay down your shovel, sit on your ass, light up a Camel, this IS the promised … Continue reading