Signs That Technology Has Taken Over Your Life
(Part 3 of 3)
21. You become upset when a person calls you on the phone to sell
you something, but you think it’s okay for a computer to call and
demand that you start pushing buttons on your telephone to receive
more information about the product it is selling.
22. You know without a doubt that disks come in five-and-a-
quarter-and three-and-a-half-inch sizes.
23. Al Gore strikes you as an “intriguing” fellow.
24. You own a set of itty-bitty screw-drivers and you actually know
where they are.
25. While contemporaries swap stories about their recent hernia
surgeries, you compare mouse-induced index-finger strain with a
26. You are so knowledgeable about technology that you feel secure
enough to say “I don’t know” when someone asks you a technology
question instead of feeling compelled to make something up.
27. You rotate your screen savers more frequently than your
28. You have a functioning home copier machine, but every toaster
you own turns bread into charcoal.
29. You have ended friendships because of irreconcilably different
opinions about which is better — the track ball or the track *pad*.
30. You understand all the jokes in this message. If so, my
friend, technology has taken over your life. We suggest, for your
own good, that you go lie under a tree and write a haiku. And don’t
use a laptop.