roxanne

Everyone who watched the movie “Roxanne” will recall the scene in a bar where
Steve Martin’s character humiliates a wise- guy who has made a rude remark
about his nose. The guy is asked if he can’t come up with some wittier remark
than he made, and he sarcastically asks if Martin can come up with something
better. Martin says he can in fact produce twenty “Something Betters”.

Did anyone notice that in fact he reels off TWENTY-FIVE?

1. Obvious: “Excuse me, is that your nose, or did a bus park on your face?”

2. Meteorological: “Everybody take cover, she’s going to blow!”

3. Fashionable: “You know, you could de-emphasize your nose if you wore
something larger, like Wyoming.”

4. Personal: “Well, here we are, just the three of us.”

5. Punctual: “All right, Dellman, your nose was on time, but you were fifteen
minutes late.”

6. Envious: “Ooh, I wish I were you, to be able to smell your own ear.”

7. Naughty: “Pardon me, sir, some of the ladies have asked if you wouldn’t
mind putting that thing away.”

8. Philosophical: “You know, it’s not the size of a nose that’s important,
it’s what’s in it what matters.”

9. Humorous: “Laugh and the world laughs with you; sneeze and it’s goodbye
Seattle.”

10. Commercial: “Hi, I’m Earl Scheib, and I can paint that nose for $39.95.”

11. Polite: “Ah, would you mind not bobbing your head? The, ah, orchestra
keeps changing tempo.”

12. Melodic: (Everybody) “He’s got the whole world.. in his nose.”

13. Sympathetic: “Ooh, what happened, did your parents lose a bet with God?”

14. Complimentary: “You must love the little birdies to give them this to
perch on.”

15. Scientific: “Say, does that thing there influence the tides?”

16. Obscure: “Hoo, I’d hate to see the grindstone.”

17. Enquiry: “When you stop and smell the flowers, are they afraid?”

18. French: “Sir, ze pigs have refused to find any more truffles until you
leave.”

19. Pornographic: “Finally, a man can satisfy two women at once.”

20. Religious: “The Lord giveth, and he just kept on giving, didn’t he?”

21. Disgusting: “Say, who mows your nose hair?”

22. Paranoid: “Keep that guy away from my cocaine.”

23. Romantic: “It must be wonderful to wake up in the morning and smell the
coffee … in Brazil.”

24. Appreciative: “Ooh, how original! Most people have their teeth capped.”

25. Dirty: “Your name wouldn’t be … Dick, would it?”

Bookmark the permalink.

48 Comments

  1. motorcycle loans bad credit

    Hi there! This post could not be written any better! Reading through this post reminds me of my previous room mate! He always kept talking about this. I will forward this post to him. Pretty sure he will have a good read. Thank you for sharing!

  2. Humberside debt advice

    I adored your rich writing. excellent information. I hope you release more. I will continue reading

  3. just click the next document

    Do you have a spam issue on this blog; I also am a blogger, and I was wanting to know your situation; we have developed some nice methods and we are looking to trade strategies with others, why not shoot me an email if interested.

  4. Home and Community Care

    Wonderful blog! I found it while browsing on Yahoo News. Do you have any tips on how to get listed in Yahoo News? I’ve been trying for a while but I never seem to get there! Thanks

  5. I simply want to mention I’m new to blogs and definitely liked you’re website. More than likely I’m likely to bookmark your blog post . You amazingly have very good posts. Thanks for sharing with us your web-site.

  6. You really make it seem really easy together with your presentation however I in finding this matter to be really one thing that I believe I would by no means understand. It seems too complex and extremely extensive for me. I’m having a look ahead for your next submit, I will try to get the cling of it!

  7. I can agree with all of you yes there if When I it over exactly. crabs by Sera crabs

  8. liberty reserve hyip

    My brother suggested I might like this web site. He was entirely right. This post truly made my day. You cann’t imagine simply how much time I had spent for this information! Thanks!

Comments are closed