Why are chickens so ugly?
You would be too if you have a pecker hanging out of your forehead.
Where do you get virgin wool?
From ugly sheep.
What’s green and smells like pork?
Kermit’s middle finger.
What’s the brown stuff between elephant’s toes?
What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?
A piece of ass that makes your eyes water.
How do you say fuck you in Jewish?
Why do dogs lick their balls?
Because they can.
What is organic dental floss?
Why is there a string on the end of a tampon?
So men can floss after they eat.
How do you get four queers on a barstool?
Turn it upside down.
Did you hear about the queer nail?
He laid in the road and blew a tire.
Where are an elephant’s genitals?
In his feet……if he steps on you, you’re fucked.
Why does Hilary Clinton always climb on top?
Because Bill can only fuck up.
Why does Miss Piggy use a honey and vinegar douche?
Because Kermit likes sweet and sour pork.
Why is being a dick not all it’s cracked up to be?
First of all you have a head but no brains, there are a couple of nuts following you around all the time, your next door neighbour is an ass-hole and your best friend is a cunt.